Recreation Therapist Me (RT): Hello, what’s up?
Real Me (M): Um, this appointment I guess.
RT: Yes, you are correct in that summation of what is currently up in a literal sense. I’m guessing by that statement you’d like to get straight down to business here, no chit chat on the clock methinks?
M: You’re not funny Recreation Therapist me, with your wordy attempts at humor. I’m reaching a mid-life crisis that I would love to drown in craft IPA and hot wings but my guts are getting to old for this business. You’re a bloody Recreation Therapist, find me something to do that’s more productive…what about all those surveys you had me fill out for your $200 assessment fee?
RT: Well, we’ll go through your Leisure Motivation Survey, Strengths Assessment Inventory and your Enneagram in future appointments…but for now let’s start with your True Colors because I’m lazy and probably will need more blog posts to properly analyze all your data. Plus I think you need to get moving so let’s start with a temp plan and refine.
The results of your True Colors personality test shows me that you are a blue/orange on the introverted side of the continuum. Your primary interests are in the social domain, maintaining positive relationships and making people happy….and you’ve got a bit of a wild streak, a disregard for the rules perhaps. Are you a people pleaser that perhaps drives a bit over the speed limit?
M: Isn’t it kinda of paradoxical to be a “blue” people person but also be introverted? I definitely like getting along with folks but need to recharge alone for long periods of time. Every few months I do something really crazy, like go on a total bender, but really I’m a garden variety working parent that maintains a home and cooks and does dishes and laundry….blah blah blah.
RT: Okay, see, we’re getting somewhere. So within the standard domains of Recreation Therapy practice you’ve got your Physical, Social, Emotional, Cognitive and Spiritual needs. Sounds like you are starting to sort of tune in to what you need socially….but the whole ‘going on a bender’ thing…you mentioned that the IPA/wing combo is starting to mess with your Physical domain….is that something you want to change?
M: Yeah, I keep reading this inspirational fitness books like Finding Ultra and that one about the guy who ran a marathon in Spanx and hired a Navy Seal to live with him for training. I kinda thought, hey, those guys are middle aged but they totally kick ass and do crazy stuff. But I’m not quite as crazy as them….like Rich Roll (who wrote Finding Ultra) TOTALLY hit rock bottom. He was an ALL IN alcoholic pushing it to the limits and now he’s a ridiculous athlete pushing it to the limits. Like how do you jump up to a level of intensity like that?
RT: So you want to be Rich Roll?
M: Well, yeah, look at that guy….super ripped, always eating delicious stuff, his wife seems to adore him (and vice versa) and he has a lot of really sexy bicycles. Like the lines on those bicycle frames make me drool, the symmetry, the angles….black carbon fiber woven together in a symphony of vibration absorbing rigidity.
RT: Um, wow, so you have a mild bicycle fetish. That’s completely normal for someone your age. Maybe middle aged men love to ride road cycles solely because it’s the only opportunity to wear a full body, brightly colored spandex suit in a socially acceptable fashion and wiggle your hind regions at passing motor vehicles (and each other).
M: Okay, I thought I was getting weird and elaborate but I think you might be as well.
RT: Well, let’s break down your domains. Based on your personality I think you’ll need to perhaps get a bit crazier in one of them but I’m not sure which one…..if I could read your mind right now…like every thought….what would it be telling me it wanted?
M: Well, I guess maybe it might say…you’re bored of writing this fictitious conversation so you want me to cut to the chase already. Is this how you work with all of your clients?
RT: No, usually we have to spend a lot more time figuring out where people’s interests lie and also how to overcome the barriers they perceive that prevent them from fully reaching their true actual interests as leisure interests generally (unless you’re a big poser) truly represent an individual’s interests, their intrinsic motivation, their authentic self, where they find flow, self-actualization, enlightenment, logos…whatever. So here goes with your prescription:
MY RECREATION PRESCRIPTION
Based on my in depth mind reading psychological powers due to my sole existence occurring in your imagination, I prescribe the following:
Item 1) I think two 10km runs during the week with a half marathon length on weekends. Right now your running routine is all over the place. You need to get focused and do more distance. Make sure you keep foam rolling.
The long run MUST be in a forest or a magical wilderness place. Spiritual domain and introverted restoration time. Before starting any exercise plan, see your doctor, which you never do, so don’t see your doctor, just start running in the woods and hope for the best. Watch out for bears.
Item 2) Yoga – You need some more yoga. Partially because the Body Talk lady said your hips are tight and energy is stuck there…
M: Hey! I don’t believe in that Woo Hoo out there business.
RT: Yeah, you totally do ya big wiener schnitzel. You totally buy into the energy business and you desperately hope it’s true but your rational mind says it’s impossible. That’s why you went to that dream workshop with Robert Moss and read a bunch of his books and why you had over $20 in library fines because you keep “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle for so long. So just do some damn yoga and relax, worst case scenario you get stretched out….best case scenario, you experience nirvana….can’t lose with yoga unless you pull your groin.
Speaking of which, your knees probably hurt because your hips are too tight and you’re running all the time (and occasionally smashing your knees off a sail boat deck trying to seem like you might be a competent fore decker in a season or two)…so foam roll and yoga.
Morning Yoga: Sun salutations, start with three repetitions per body side in the morning.
Evening Yoga: Kundalini Kriya for the 2nd chakra (2a) will get your hips moving. Might get you a little over excited before going to sleep but hey, just read some more books about energy and healing….or that Neurotribes book.
Item 3: Pick a random intention and word for the month of something you want to accomplish and write it on a piece of paper and put it in your pocket everyday. Every single day. Because you always wanted to see if this whole university manifestation thing worked….so all you have to lose is paper and ink….you may get a paper cut.
- You’ve got to find some things for your cognitive domain. I think perhaps writing this blog is helpful, but we need some corpus callosum stimulating something or other….both sides of the brain….so music methinks. Anyways, think about what you want to do to get the old brain working in a way that is completely different from your workplace (writing and reading constantly). Piano, singing, clog dancing…
- Find something crazy to do that’s kind of healthy. A ridiculous run or a crazy rock climb….something totally stupid and ridiculous that’s dangerous and that I could, as a quasi-recognized health professional, never actually endorse…but ya know, if you don’t do the crazy….how will you ever live up to Rich Roll?
Also, write your thoughts in a journal and do some gardening and take a walk in nature…because EVERY health blog EVER always says to do that stuff….so it’s probably worth doing.